WORTHLESS ME

murmurs,
washing over me,
no,
sinking in
the pain,
pinching,
pricking,
I pretend not to heed,
But,
I cringe
I wish,
I would let it go
But the mask,
Remains,
on my burned face
tears,
they don’t flow
the eyes,
burning,
Look away
Oh,
Let me remove,
the protecting disguise
I turn away,
The Scrutiny,
Piercing the hollow me
Me,
A disgrace
Oh,
Wishing,
Would let it go,
But the hate,
Killing me

another attempt

scared,
I stand there,
Not sure
Hesitating,
Whether to move
Or accept the loss
I shift away from the wall,
Ready to blend,
But I’m shoved away
I ponder,
Whether to retrieve,
to the spot of comfort,
Or to struggle on.
Along the wall,
I crawl forward
Not sure,,
Whether I’ll be welcome or not
I draw courage,
Wall, a comfort
I move,
Ready to face
But hands,
Unfamiliar,
Thrust me back,
To the mark where I belonged
And I,
I don’t protest,
I give in
I stand there,
Wanting an escape,
Thinking of a way
and I hear the familiar sound,
knew what it meant.
I turn back,
Swept away,
Finally, retrieve
I accept the defeat
There is always another day,
I mused
But I know,
I couldn't do it
I know,
It is,
A hopeless attempt